The Last of 2008

So when I ushered 2008 in, I did it recklessly at a beach with a couple of friends. I have no idea what I was high on because it has become pretty apparent that that night turned out slightly wild. Now, I've always had this thing about how you start your year off and it relating to how the rest of the year will turn out. Well, to be really honest, that's what the whole year felt like. A wild ride.

In this year alone I've grown a lot. A rhetoric, no doubt. But yet I think that by verbalizing this truth the reality of this becomes more evident. A lot about me has changed, mostly on perceptions I have on life, love and related. Which will come as a surprise to many of you because this is my SPM year. SPM, to say the very least, felt dead. And insignificant. And because of that I am going to dread the day my mother collects my result slip for me. (I hope she's not reading this.)

One of the biggest changes that happened was my decision to leave MPYO. I left that vibrant, full-of-life orchestra in early April. A hard decision, no doubt but I figured that it was high time to get priorities straight. I am not pursuing music as a career so whatever that lies ahead as far as music is concerned stays dim. It makes little sense to continue giving so much commitment when there are other more important things to attend to.

I left many friends in MPYO, a lot of them I hold on dearly to. It came a pleasant surprise when a couple of them (Jebat, Su Yin, Kelly) came down to Penang for various reasons (SAT, TOEFL, Brother's Scrabble competition). Felt really good to just hang out with them after months of not seeing each other. :)

Also the year 2008 is my final year in sucky ol' MGS. Walking by the same buildings, being around the same people and this is the eleventh hour year of just doing that. I think that I have a love-hate relationship with my school. I complain about it constantly but there is a sense of belonging that I have towards my green and yellow despite my dissatisfaction towards the school. (Like during every weekly Prefect meeting the teacher in-charge will constantly glance at my best friend, Amy, and I waiting for us to oppose any new instruction/rule/system etc. I didn't realize this until one day my teacher came to me and said "Adelyn, Amy... everything okay? You both happy with our system? Wtf. Zzz.)

I guess in many ways a school is like a family. You may fight. You may hurl the bitchiest of bitchy comments (Welcome to an all-girl school) at each other. But yet there are times where we unite when it comes to inter-school competitions.

My Georgian relatives, especially those from the generation prior to mine, always tell me that MGS has an identity of being horrifically bitchy, even back in the day. I would be lying if I said that there is no truth to that statement. But despite all that, being in such an environment only teaches you to fend for yourself. Maybe find one or two kind souls along the way but even that is rare.

However. 2008 took a turn for the better. Maybe it's the thought of this being the final year, never having to see each other in the same environment that we all seemed to work together a little better. Less disputes seem to pop out. In fact it wasn't really disputes among students but more like "5 Science 1 vs teachers". You bunch have the worst attitude. Familiar? Haih.

Well to be really honest. I think my time in MGS has taught me a lot, forced me to grow up and to have a chapter, no wait, a book full of timeless events. I am going to miss a lot about school, to be really honest. I AM GOING TO MISS BULLYING CHERYL CHEW FANG YING EVERY DAY IN CLASS!!!!!!!! T________________T Plz wear proper clothez when I c u k? wtf zzz

Sorry being a little emotional here.

Okay I'm just going to say this once: I GUESS I MISS STUPID OLD 5 SCIENCE 1. T_T School would have been really boring if there was no drama in class. I probably would have skipped the whole year of school if you guys weren't in class!!!!

Moving on.

Some of you would know that in the first six months of this year I was seeing this guy. In that time, I fell in love again after swimming in and out of meaningless relationships for a couple of years. When I fell in love again, I fell deep and hard. Everyone could see that I was happy again. Perpetually happy. For the first time I never had to 'settle' for a guy. It was a relationship with a lot of potential I guess but sometimes potential and stability can be deceiving. Because in the end it didn't work out.

But you know what? I don't feel like anything was lost in that time. People have asked me if I ever feel any sense of regret, honestly, I don't. In fact, I feel even more inspired to continue searching for love and to love even more. How many of you have ever felt inspired and motivated by a significant other? How many of you have felt this drive to better yourself? If that was love then I want to feel that way again.

So after the break up you've got your usual dose of sadistic thoughts like "omg if i kill myself/ran into a bus/died/got hospitalized etc etc. will he notice?", a lot of people particularly close friends and classmates came to my aid! I am so grateful for all of you, listening to my endless complaints and whines of whatifs and couldbes. I would make a list of everyone but the list would be ridiculously long and... boring.

And this year one of the most important lessons learned is that the best things happen unexpectedly. Always.

Thank You, God for a wonderful 2008. I am a quite reluctant to let the year go, I feel like this has been the best year I've lived and I feel apprehensive for the future. I sincerely hope that 2009 will be painted with as much colour as 2008. :)

BRING IT 2009!!!